on halloween

31 Oct

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Halloween, originally uploaded by fabbio.

Tonight is Halloween.

Now you can call me an old-crank spoilsport if you please, but I just don’t get why we’ve bought into this American holiday (although, yeah, I can totally understand why retailers have embraced it). I know kids love sweets, horror and creepy crawlies, but usually, at least in our town, they’re older kids after cold hard Stirling.

“Sweets?

What? Haven’t you got any money?”

You see what I’m getting at? In many cases, Trick or Treat’rs are gangs of bloody teenagers crawling the streets hoping to get enough for a few cans of Old Wife-Beater – or Stella, as it’s more frequently known. It’s not about the spirit of festival or even a cheeky nod to our historical dalliance with witchcraft, it’s about fleecing people out of cash.

I’m sure when my kids are a few years older (or maybe even next year for the boy) I’ll be dressing them up and taking them down our street. But I’ll be conscious of so many occupants who dread the doorbell. Will it be a hand-full of *supervised* cutiepies dressed as skeletons, or half-a-dozen dickheads with a £1 plastic mask and their hoodies drawn up.

I know I sound terribly Daily Mail, but I’m just not looking forward to tonight. Maybe I’ll camp out on the roof with an air-rifle – that’ll really put the heebie jeebies up the little shits.

Happy Halloween.

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14 Responses to “on halloween”

  1. jo@alwaysdo.co.nz November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am #

    This is not so prevelant in NZ, but is growing every year (led by the retailers of course). I find a bag of sweets for the supervised cuties is fine…. and for the teenagers in $1 plastic masks and hoodies I find that offering to read their fortune with my tarot cards usually clears my front porch. Of course, the fact I show the cards face up with the death card on top might have something to do with it……?

  2. jo@alwaysdo.co.nz November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am #

    This is not so prevelant in NZ, but is growing every year (led by the retailers of course). I find a bag of sweets for the supervised cuties is fine…. and for the teenagers in $1 plastic masks and hoodies I find that offering to read their fortune with my tarot cards usually clears my front porch. Of course, the fact I show the cards face up with the death card on top might have something to do with it……?

  3. mikepower@gmail.com October 31, 2007 at 2:32 pm #

    The amount of merchandise on sale is incredible! What a racket. I’ve got a couple of full-head latex masks I used to wear for the Hasting’s carnival which I’ve used in the past when I’ve opened the door. Add an old raincoat and a ‘blood-stained’ cleaver and it tends to scare the shit out of most of them. They are still only interested in money though 😦

  4. mikepower@gmail.com October 31, 2007 at 2:32 pm #

    The amount of merchandise on sale is incredible! What a racket. I’ve got a couple of full-head latex masks I used to wear for the Hasting’s carnival which I’ve used in the past when I’ve opened the door. Add an old raincoat and a ‘blood-stained’ cleaver and it tends to scare the shit out of most of them. They are still only interested in money though 😦

  5. mineytodd@btinternet.com October 31, 2007 at 3:44 pm #

    See you there………let’s get the bastards !and then take their money.Hehhehheh

  6. mineytodd@btinternet.com October 31, 2007 at 3:44 pm #

    See you there………let’s get the bastards !and then take their money.Hehhehheh

  7. fish@politicalpenguin.org.uk October 31, 2007 at 4:58 pm #

    Can I join you? Don’t worry, I can bring my own rifle. 😉

  8. fish@politicalpenguin.org.uk October 31, 2007 at 4:58 pm #

    Can I join you? Don’t worry, I can bring my own rifle. 😉

  9. aaronsheath@gmail.com October 31, 2007 at 6:47 pm #

    Is this, now, my own gang?Hmmmm. Interesting…;)

  10. aaronsheath@gmail.com October 31, 2007 at 6:47 pm #

    Is this, now, my own gang?Hmmmm. Interesting…;)

  11. null@childfacsimile.biz October 31, 2007 at 7:11 pm #

    I’ve just spent the afternoon selling pumpkins, and every single one went to what I would assume were mums. There are bands of teenagers making mischief going around (I told one lot to fuck off when they said “trick or treat”) but it’s still mostly small children supervised by adults, and I think we worry far too much about something that happens once a year and which is after all, meant to be fun, something we seem to be lacking at the moment.

  12. null@childfacsimile.biz October 31, 2007 at 7:11 pm #

    I’ve just spent the afternoon selling pumpkins, and every single one went to what I would assume were mums. There are bands of teenagers making mischief going around (I told one lot to fuck off when they said “trick or treat”) but it’s still mostly small children supervised by adults, and I think we worry far too much about something that happens once a year and which is after all, meant to be fun, something we seem to be lacking at the moment.

  13. aaronsheath@gmail.com November 1, 2007 at 11:01 am #

    I was rather presently surprised by the number of *supervised* groups pounding the streets of Newark, actually enjoying the night and behaving impeccably. Maybe times are changing. Maybe fun can be the predominant theme of Halloween. I’d like that – I’m not a miserable bastard for the sake of it.

  14. aaronsheath@gmail.com November 1, 2007 at 11:01 am #

    I was rather presently surprised by the number of *supervised* groups pounding the streets of Newark, actually enjoying the night and behaving impeccably. Maybe times are changing. Maybe fun can be the predominant theme of Halloween. I’d like that – I’m not a miserable bastard for the sake of it.

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