A letter to The Daily Mail

An asylum seeker - London

Like many other dastardly asylum seekers this ‘Paddington’ entered the United Kingdom illegally; concealed in a ships lifeboat, stowed away undetected by the authorities.

Another parasite, he arrived penniless and desperate, hoping for the British Tax Payer to support him. It’s a scandal that our porous boarders are unfit to keep out undesirables like this pesky bear. Of course ‘Paddington’ has absolutely no intention of providing for himself, and relies on the charity of the good British people – namely the Brown family – to keep him in marmalade.

Should we as a sovereign nation allow such vermin to clutter our streets? It would not be so bad, were it not for his attire: ‘Paddington’ dresses more like a sex pest than a normal British citizen, with his ill-fitting hat and long blue duffle coat, note: he never wears trousers nor underpants. Pervert!

I know, I know, his family were supposedly ‘killed’ in a Peruvian earthquake, but why is that our problem? And haven’t we heard these sob stories before? Anyway is there no charity in Peru? What happened to all the bloody foreign aid we ship off? No, it’s not not enough that your taxes help out his tin-pot country; ‘Paddington’ also wants you to support him personally. Well the Great British public have had enough with his sort, and we are demanding action. We demand that this ‘Paddington’, and millions of other scroungers be deported back to their own country.

It’s an outrage, it’s a disgrace, and I could not be more disgusted.

Yours,
A furious Daily Mail reader.

Smack my Iraqi up

What is the News of the World playing at? While no one would offer anything but condemnation for the brutal beatings dealt to the defenceless Iraqi youths, one cannot fathom the mentality of the editorial of the NOTW for publishing these shots.

While the Muslim World is drunk on it’s own self-importance, a British newspaper throws petrol on the flames. Of course the paper will claim it felt the pictures were in the public interest, well what interest would that be? Our collective interest in the News of the World’s circulation? The British people have certainly not benefited from this story, and just as the Cartoon fracas looks to have blown itself out – see the muted protests on Saturday – in Britain, we have that bastion of idiocy the News of the World reigniting the anger all over again.

Maybe the Murdoch rag was entirely aware of the outrage dissipating and wanted to enrage the Islamic Diaspora further? Maybe as the neoconservatives turn up the heat on Iran, we need yet another reason to believe the ‘clash of the civilisation’ hyperbole? A few thousand fanatics or so going nuts all over our television screens will certainly make sure millions of ignoramuses in the West run for their crucifixes. It pains the soft-skinned Western disposition to view ‘crazies’ going loco on their cities. Just as well they never film our own crazies going loco each and every January, imagine it: several thousand middle-aged women trashing House of Fraser, tearing garments from the hangers, jumping over each other, the occasional strangulation, all for a discounted frock that was overpriced to begin with.

Maybe it’s British self-flagellation, our innate compulsion to punish ourselves, but I guess I would have to ask Ruth Kelly about that. The fact remains that the newspaper could have taken the pictures to the authorities, who could have punished the soldiers quietly. This way the pictures would not have been shown ad nauseam all over the Arabic news channels. I would have expected al Jazeera etc. to have broken their necks to release these picture, but one of our own newspapers – surely this boarders on high-treason?

Still the news has been broken, and the Islamic World is enraged again. All that is left is to attempt to limit the damage, and severely punish the soldiers guilty; but most of all we need to ensure this doesn’t happen again. We need to ensure our troops do not resort to such savagery, or at least if they do, that it’s on home leave on a Friday night in Stevenage.